Stress in every corner doesn't help, but indecision tends to plague me, compounding every problem.
Two weeks ago Shiraz was so spooky I was afraid to ride her. In fact I did not ride most of the week leading up to the derby. After about two weeks of just feeling like maybe it was not a good fit, I decided to remove Shiraz from that barn and move her to one that had been recommended to me.
So I moved her. The new barn is great. The property backs onto the park. I can ride to the xc course. There is a xc coach on site. Shiraz is completely MELLOW and my first ride on her there was FANTASTIC. Not one single step of jig. WTF?!!!
But. WHY IS THERE A BUT?!!
The hay is always round bales. I checked the hay on my tour. It happened to be a very good bale (super clean and fantastic grass mix) and the BO does not put the bale in the paddocks but tractors in servings. I know from personal experience round bales are typically dusty and would fork in servings rather than drop a bale into the paddock. Unfortunately on bringing Shiraz there, I noted the piles of hay tractored in were actually very dusty. Ya, round bales can be hit or miss. Some are horrible and some are great, even from the same field baled on the same day. My own hay shed is full of that proof. But more alarming was that four out of six of Shiraz's pasture mates have very bad chronic coughs.
I'm so disappointed, sad, feeling foolish for jumping in to do best by my horse and just making things worse.
I am feeling a lot of horse community pressure. Very important people recommended this move and disapproved of my previous barn. It did not cause my initial move, but it is making me worry about switching back to my original barn choice if they will have me. I cannot find another option that I can afford in the area. I hate that I have to chose between physical health and mental wellbeing. Knowing that the quiet Shiraz is still there, I have hope she will settle in with time if she goes back. I mean, why the hell wouldn't she? Right?
|Lady, I can't even look at you. Just pick a place and let me be. -- Shiraz, most likely.|